Three years ago, I met a Belgian girl who brought so much joy to every coffee date, to every party and every time we would just sit by the sea and hang out, she would be a ray of sunshine. She was an Erasmus student in my beloved Zadar and her time there flew by way too quickly. A few days ago, I finally saw her again.
Before I moved to Bruxelles, I made a bucket list with all the places I need to visit. On the very top was her home town, Antwerp just so I can see her and hear that soothing voice again. I was aware of the time that passed but it still shocked me when we started reminiscing all those beautiful moments… I was in awe of her. How much she changed, how much she grew as a person and how she stayed the same at the same time. It’s weird and maybe funny to say that but I felt so proud of her. Because in my mind, she is a confused student who is away from home for the first time and relies on us to help her feel welcome and safe in a foreign city and a foreign country. Just this time, I was a stranger in her city and she took care of me.
I still think of her while sitting in my room, home away from home, talking to friends who want to come and visit me in my new city (it’s not hard to make an offer they cannot refuse as they all have a sweet tooth and I, after all, now live in Belgium). I am thinking about how many new beginnings exchange brought to her and how many new beginnings knocked on my door in the last month. I still sometimes catch myself thinking I need to pack soon, check in for a flight back to Croatia and continue where I left off. There are these weird, funny flashes that go through my head when I walk down the street and hear so many languages and see so many different people. Maybe it also has something to do with staying with a friend for the first two weeks (I love you, thank you) and then moving in a house with a few more people who also come from different countries and now needing to adjust again.
The first housemate I met after moving in was a Polish girl. When we started talking, she explained that she is a Blue Book Trainee and works in the Humanitarian Aid. While she was a student, she was on Erasmus in Bruxelles and it was partly a reason for coming back here. The only thing is…she was on Erasmus ten years ago and she is a Mum to two little girls. Who are in Poland, with their Dad. While their Mum is trying to learn something new so she can find a better job.
I cannot explain how hard this hit me. I asked her a lot of questions but I have a million more. I just needed all my self-control to not ask something too personal as we literally just met. One of the reasons why it hit right in the feelings is the fact that she is a teacher. Just like me. And she also comes from a country where teachers are underpaid and don’t work in good conditions. I know some of my colleagues are happy in their schools and I am happy for them. I truly am because I have witnessed their hard work, sleepless nights, tears of sadness and joy. But I also know that some of my colleagues work in three or four different schools just to get by.
What made me feel connected to her is the fact that we both left our homes hoping it will be an investment in a better future, in a good job and an opportunity to grow as a person. Of course, it was easier for me as nothing kept me in Croatia. And by nothing, I don’t mean my friends as I would love for all of them to be here with me and laugh at my bad pronunciation of ‘Bonjour’ and ‘Merci’ (because that’s all I need when going to a store) but for now, occasional visits and sleepovers with a lot of chocolate and waffles will have to do.
On the other hand, she has two daughters she wants to make proud. She has a husband who took on the roles of both parents. And I couldn’t admire her more. Because it takes a lot to decide on that kind of a new beginning. She doesn’t know it but every day I see her, I remind myself why I came and what I want to do and become one day. Or how Zig Ziglar put it ‘People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.’
Because of two of them, because of the people I am lucky to work with and because of all those who took a leap of faith before me, I am not afraid of my new beginnings.
Aurelia's Wreath 